Category Archives: Straight Talk

You Knew

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If you know me, you know that I am your realist friend; the honest one who will have those difficult conversations with you. I have matured and grown from some very painful truths and feel better having faced them. Today, I want to address many of you on your willingness to learn what you can about systemic racism and how you may support African-Americans moving forward. Like so many others, I shall do my best to help you on this journey by having conversations, directing you to reading materials, organizations and businesses that can assist answering questions and providing collaborative suggestions. There is just one thing I must make clear:

YOU KNEW

The first time you laid eyes on the internal contents of a slave ship

slave ship

 

YOU KNEW

 

The first time you read about plantation life

plantationfamily

YOU KNEW

When you learned about the Civil War

confederate flag

YOU KNEW

 

The first time you saw lynching pictures in your history books

Lynching

YOU KNEW

 

When you were introduced to Ruby Bridges, The Freedom Riders, Malcolm X, Martin Luther King, Jr., Rosa Parks, Medgar Evers, Angela Davis, Fred Hampton, James Baldwin, Langston Hughes, Ralph Abernathy, John Lewis, President Barack Obama

YOU KNEW

 

The first time you recognized segregation, whether it be at school lunch tables, University campuses, residential neighborhoods, workplaces, public spaces or places of worship

YOU KNEW

 

Your parents knew, their parents knew and your great-grandparents knew too. The only detail that has changed is now acts of racism can take center stage on your phone in a matter of moments. You are instantly reminded of it in real time by your President on Twitter; you can join FB pages dedicated to white supremacy.

You will not have to wait to read about Mr. George Floyd because you watched him die. This time, it was a knee instead of a rope.

African Americans know you knew. Maybe the sensory overload of witnessing a man call for his mother while the life disappears from his eyes was your tipping point. Maybe it wasn’t, but we see you. We know you. We see many of you struggling with the terror of watching what you knew all along, manifest itself in broad daylight for the world to see. This wasn’t supposed to be possible in 2020, but yet you say nothing to the neighbor who flies the confederate flag, the uncle who tells the racist joke at dinner, the co-worker who promotes negative stereotypes, your school board that doesn’t place priority on hiring minority teachers. All of these examples contributed to a bird-watcher being harassed, a jogger gunned down in cold blood, the weight pressed upon the neck of George Floyd and too many more to mention.

Listen, don’t get me wrong; better late than never. I’m going to help you as best I can to become a better ally, but just know that I know YOU KNEW.

What? Huh?

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Giving it to you straight today…

Don’t act like you didn’t know your actions were wrong. Don’t pretend you didn’t realize putting brown shoe polish on your face might be a poor choice. Don’t feign ignorance of cultural misappropriation when you select to paint yourself in your patronizing, disrespectful, lame interpretation of a person of color. You know EXACTLY what you’re doing.

YOU DON’T CARE.

You were so bold to show these behaviors amongst approving peers, why not be bold now and tell the truth? We might see a shred of integrity.

I’ve witnessed you seek out like minded people, slipping your racist and bigoted opinions into regular conversation to test the waters. You’ve tried it on me. I look like I might be a willing participant. You must try it and see who can be trusted.

Actual conversation I had with a subordinate my first week in a new workplace:

Them: I have weebees in my neighborhood

Me: What’s a weebee?

Them: You know. Black people. We be goin to the liquor store. We be stealing your tv.

Me: That’s some of the most fucking ignorant shit I’ve ever heard. Do not ever communicate with me again except to provide me with the information I request from you.

Them: I’m sorry. I didn’t know.

Me: Apology not accepted.

 

You know what you’re doing. You’re constantly looking for allies so your behavior is somehow justified and sadly, you find them.

The excuses you give are sometimes more insulting than the act itself.

Virginia Governor: I put shoe polish on my face because I wanted to pay homage to Michael Jackson. I love him.

Prada: We didn’t know an accessory we created depicting a black monkey with giant red lips would be considered offensive.

Dolce & Gabbana: We had no idea that sending Blackamoor earrings down the runway or making videos depicting Chinese models trying to eat cannoli with chop sticks was unacceptable.

Princess of Kent: I never thought wearing a Blackamoor brooch to meet Meghan Markle might be in poor taste.

Newsanchor and Weatherman: I didn’t mean to say Martin Luther Coon King, Jr.  It was a slip of the tongue. I’m not racist.

Rosanne: I know I said if the Muslim Brotherhood and Planet of the Apes had a baby, it would be Valerie Jarrett, but I was high on Ambien.

Hulk Hogan: I said I’m a racist when it comes to my daughter fucking niggers, but I didn’t mean it. That’s just protective dad talk.

At the Oscars: It was an accident to say Zendaya probably smelled like patchouli oil and weed because she was wearing dreadlocks. We meant we like that smell. It was taken out of context.

Mel Gibson: I know I said Jews were responsible for all the wars in the world, but in my defense, I was really drunk. 

 I have some advice to anyone who would like to impersonate Michael Jackson. The glove and hat are a dead giveaway. Blackface isn’t homage, it’s mockery.

Prada and Gucci, show me a species of monkey that has giant red lips. I’ve seen monkeys with big red asses. Why don’t you make an accessory or sweater of that?

Also, I’ve never accidentally called someone nigger or coon and I’ve never posed in a photo with a klansman or nazi (real or fake). Truth be told, neither has anyone else (accidentally, that is).

The feigning ignorance jig is up, folks. You did it. You knew it was unacceptable behavior, but you did it anyway. You got caught and that’s why you’re apologizing. As I said to that trailer trash secretary (yes, she worked in a trailer and was a garbage individual), apology not accepted.

 

Irish Lives Matter

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I never realized Black History Month was so contentious until this year. Never have I witnessed so many up in arms about a dedicated month to celebrate the contributions made by African Americans. I was asked why can’t there be an Irish History Month or a Confederate Flag Day. In the spirit of satisfying as many American citizens as possible, I’ve decided to create a list of contributions as well as atrocities suffered by our Irish American citizens and see if it warrants a month of celebration.

 Here goes:

·       The Irish were stolen from their native homelands, subjected to torturous passage to the colonies where they were enslaved for more than 200 years

·       The Irish were bought and sold, families torn apart, considered livestock and routinely murdered for entertainment during their slavery

·       When Irish slavery was finally abolished, the Irish were still not considered fully human and they continued to be treated unfairly, their homesteads often pillaged and burned, Irish women raped and beaten, Irish men hanged

·       When the Irish went looking for work, they were routinely turned away by signs saying “Irish Not Need Apply”

·       Irish children were not allowed to go to school with non-Irish children and Irish families were not allowed to eat in many restaurants, stay in certain hotels or ride on mass transportation

·       The Irish were held back by laws created to keep them in a position of helplessness and poverty. Many of these laws prohibited The Irish from voting, applying for bank loans, going to college or starting a business

·       The Irish are fighters and they demanded justice and equality from the United States Government

·       However, the discrimination continued as loan or job applications were turned down when banks and employers glanced at the name McDonald or O’Rourke

·       Many Irish, determined to become great American citizens, did so by enlisting in our military, serving in every major American war and rising through the ranks to Generals and Admirals

·       The Irish have given America great leaders, many whom, unfortunately were assassinated by a bigot’s bullet. This did not deter the Irish. They formed organizations to strengthen their quest for equality by creating schools and universities when they were denied entrance into others, political action committees to petition for Irish representation where it had been absent for hundreds of years, watch groups to protect Irish citizens when police refused assistance and Irish churches where The Irish could worship and pray in peace

·       Despite advances in Irish American life, Irish Americans still have the highest percentage of unemployment in America, highest percentage of infant mortality under the age of 3, Irish American women are more likely than non-Irish American women to die in childbirth and Irish Americans are least likely to prosper in a thriving economy

·       Irish American men have a greater percentage of mental health issues as many suffer from a form of PTSD brought on by the constant struggle to be treated fairly and equally in America.  Depression often leads Irish American men to drug addiction and crime at a higher rate due to lack of mental health treatment and the historical fear and distrust Irish Americans have for the medical profession

 

·       The Irish have been instrumental in the forming of America and the world in the fields of Science, Technology, Engineering, Arts, Mathematics; not to mention the countless inventions by Irish Americans for which we rely on without the least bit of knowledge that an Irish American is responsible

·       Irish American culture IS American culture as it has impacted every aspect of American society from dance, dress, language, religion, music, literature, cuisine, yet strangely remains untold 

 

This is only the tip of the proverbial Irish American iceberg.

By recognizing Irish Americans, their contributions, their history of tribulations and triumphs, their continued struggle for equality some 400 years after the first Irish slave was brought to the colonies, perhaps we can all gain a better understanding of Irish Americans and appreciate them as a people. By learning about Irish American history, we can all, as Americans, work to ensure we don’t repeat the brutalities of the past and pave a road to a better future for Irish American people.

See what I did here?

 

 

 

Freedom Light

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This is the last thing I will say about this. Alright, it probably isn’t, but humor me for a moment.

I like the flag. I think it’s a lovely design and my hat is off to Mrs. Ross. I don’t mind standing for it and I don’t mind singing the National Anthem. It’s more of a tradition than a rule like it is in, let’s say, N. Korea. In other words, my life is no worse or better for rising any more than the flag is less respected when that enormous one is rolled up and stored on the ground, waiting to be unfurled during that opening NFL ceremony (paid for by the US Government to bolster enlistment).

 I can like and appreciate the flag because I understand that a piece of fabric does not truly and accurately represent the fabric of this country. I’m not “flag hypocritical”. I enjoy that our flag is a symbol of power and pride and it is admittedly exciting to await its arrival during the Olympic opening ceremonies. It can be a heart-swelling experience to see fellow citizens walking proudly, displaying The Stars and Stripes. To me, it can be a comfort when traveling abroad and you catch a quick glimpse of one. For all intents and purposes, it is the universal sign of democracy and I am proud to be an American even when America doesn’t always love me back.

Like I said, I am not “flag hypocritical”. I fly one at my home, but I don’t bring it in each evening, nor is it up lit. At some point or another, I have probably purchased a t-shirt at Old Navy around July 4th and worn it. I do somewhat follow protocol when disposing of a tattered flag, but I do not perform the ceremony in its entirety (or even close). I just burn it. I’m not even really mad when I see girls wrapping their vaginas in bikini thong stripes with star covered areolas. Hey, it’s a free country.

I am the daughter of a WWII veteran who was also a POW in Germany during 1944-1945. Dad flies several flags including The Red White and Blue, POW MIA, 457th Bomb Group and 8th Air Force, to name a few. If you ask him, he will tell you that he enlisted, yes left college and enlisted, to protect our Freedoms. However, Freedom means different things to different people. Several men he knew, enlisted to avoid incarceration.  When he left on that ship crossing the ocean into uncertainty, Dad was certain of his mission to secure America’s  Freedom and defeat the Axis of Evil. When he returned, he learned Freedom was merely an interpretation of an individual or group agenda.

You see, I’ve seen my father cheered and revered for his bravery and heroism. I’ve also seen him called a nigger lover and a disgrace to his race, each by people waving an American flag. I’ve heard him called an All-American Boy and I’ve heard him called an Un-American race mixer, each by people waving an American flag. I’ve watched my parents carefully plot travel routes resembling a covert spy operation when driving to Disneyworld because there are places they dared not venture through; places where “patriots” fly the confederate flag as high as Old Glory. I’ve been in situations where I am considered less than deserving of rights and civil liberties by officers wearing an American flag patch on their uniform shoulder.

Freedom is subjective.

I would like you to marinate on this for a while. When you see someone taking a knee during the National Anthem simultaneously with another guy to your left wearing a baseball hat, or kids talking and laughing under Friday night lights, remember “flag hypocrisy” and that your American experience does not define the experiences of others.

Will I take a knee? Probably not (mainly because I’m not sure I could get back up) but I won’t berate those who choose to exercise their Freedoms in such a manner any more than I would slap the hat off that man’s head. Do you have to agree? Of course not. Can you be offended? Of course, you can. In the grand scheme of things, does it really alter your life’s plan? I’m going to guess no.

The ultimate act of Patriotism and American strength would be if we would stop and listen to WHY instead of concentrating on how.

 

 

 

Womb Chat

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My uterus is more popular than me. She is a trending topic on Facebook and Twitter. I never imagined the type of notoriety a female body part, other than her sister, the vagina, and maybe her twin cousins, the boobs, could garnish. However, it has happened. She has graced the offices of many a local government and even made it to the international stage during a United States Presidential Debate.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but is it not the 21st Century? Didn’t our mothers already fight for this shit so we wouldn’t be bothered with such issues?  I would have imagined by now, my girl would be kicking back (which is funny because she is tipped) and taking it easy. No such luck. Even in her twilight years, my uterus has been thrust back into the spotlight and is causing quite a clamor. If you have been living under a rock, or only have two testes and a penis, let me bring you up to date. The uterus is the new black. She’s the talk of the town. She’s the cat’s meow; literally.

Since everyone is so interested in the goings on in my uterus, I’ll tell you a little bit about her.
My uterus is 50 years old and lives in Indiana where she is Enemy #1 to our governor. I call his office to speak to him about my uterus at least once a week, inviting him to my GYN appointments, asking him for advice about my uterus and giving him general updates. He hasn’t once returned my call. I assume he must be performing a pap smear on a constituent. But I digress.

Back in July of 1978, my uterus got the call from my fallopian tubes stating that an egg was coming down the chute. She was excited to finally be elevated into active duty. The rest of my twelve-year-old self, however, was on a parachute ride at Knott’s Berry Farm, and was the least bit thrilled. I believe the experience could have been described as terror, denial and embarrassment as I watched my mother share the joyous news with everyone in that amusement park bathroom. Since then, my uterus, like clockwork, has cradled those eggs and done her thing.

In the past 17 years, my uterus has produced 3 live births. From the moment they took their first breath and became independent from my uterus and the rest of my body, we (my uterus and I) have watched them grow into wonderful human beings. Unfortunately, my uterus has also delivered some duds. There have been several monthly occasions where the flow was so heavy and the cramps so bad, it looked like a case for CSI. Incidentally, that is exactly what would have happened if our governor had his way last summer. I would have had to cordon off my toilet with crime scene tape, gone fishing for a few clots and taken it to my physician or nearest medical facility where I would then be held responsible for a burial. I’m not sure, but I don’t think insurance covers bodily function interment in my MetLife plan. Again, I digress.

On a typical day, my uterus and I grocery shop, run errands and occasionally will see the uterus and vagina doctor since this whole menopause thing has us by the proverbial egg sac. I have been considering just having coffee with the governor so he can guide me through this. After all, he seems to know what’s best for us.
My uterus also accompanies me to a program I volunteer with that mentors at-risk teens. Together, we give young women and men the opportunity to talk openly about relationships, boundaries, respect, responsibility, sex and the importance of education. I must admit, the old uterus is pretty wise when it comes to lecturing about self-care, self-respect and responsibility. She’s not an armchair uterus that just spouts off orders to other uteri. She’s in there, front and center, helping other uteri understand and make informed decisions.

My uterus and I like to help but we also understand that just as my uterus is part of my body, like my heart, kidneys, liver and other internal organs, she only functions because I function. Her health and welfare depend on me, the vessel. Together, we understand that each vessel is unique. Each vessel is responsible for her own course. It is also important to note that a vessel does not lose her command even when she must lose her uterus. Contrary to the belief of some,we are not defined by our uterus. We can survive without a uterus, thrive and even run for President. However, it cannot survive without us.

Old girl is getting tired and headed into retirement soon. She will no longer be part of a trending topic or heated discussion regarding purpose. Although, in the future, the only thing she may be capable of producing are tumbleweeds, she still deserves the privacy and respect she did in her heyday. My uterus is not independent of me, nor is she up for debate among strangers. I protect her and she has served me well

The purpose of allowing you, the reader, to get to know my uterus, is to advise you that the business of regulating personal reproductive rights is degrading and discourteous. To allow you to dictate rules and laws, to listen as you gush a series of opinions as to what each and every individual woman and her uterus must comply with, you must first know each and every uterus intimately. You now know mine, only 125.9 million to go.

The Talk

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Today is the day I decided to have the dreaded “talk” with my daughters. I had put it off far too long. These girls are constantly bombarded with social media that could be corroding their proper judgment. After all, they are teenagers now; they need and deserve to know all vital information and facts contributing to their long term sexual health.

I began by building a gentle foundation.

Girls, there comes a time in your life when your body begins to blossom like a beautiful and delicate flower, basking in the sun and frolicking in the garden of maturity. Mother Nature sprinkles her monthly lady glitter upon you that symbolizes your priceless gift of admission into womanhood. Your upper body landscape has begun to reveal perky new buds of growth and wonderment, while your lower region will undergo a fuzzy expansion of luxurious underbrush that serves to shroud your sacred bits.

As these changes become more noticeable, you will begin to attract attention from many who desire to dominate you. You may not realize it at first, as these persons are sneaky, often using slick words, lies and sometimes intimidation to trick you. Often they will seek to control your thoughts, emotions, your every sexual consideration; all to deem themselves superior to you.

They will tell you what to do, where to go, who to love and who to hate. On occasion, they will verbally abuse you in an effort to get what they want. They will attempt to strip you of your dignity and make you feel dirty. They will even go as far as to recount that God said it was okay.

If you object, they will tell everyone you are a whore.

If you give in and give of yourself, they will inevitably move on to the next bloom. Once they have what they want, they won’t care what happens to you.

Yes, girls, I’m talking about the Republican Party.

You must fight, like your mother, to keep them away from your vagina and out of your uterus. They are a misogynistic bunch who seem to be willing to stop at nothing until they are inside you. Stand strong with your sisters and vow to help educate others about this misguided, dangerous group.

Your body belongs to you and no one else. Care for it like a temple, but don’t take any bullshit.

Mom

Donald Trump. Donald T. Don T. Don’T.

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Let me just get right to this.

Anyone voting for Donald Trump is dimwitted. That’s right, I said it.

Thick. Dense. Slow. Unintelligent.

I have sat patiently, waiting for this country to come to its senses, but that hasn’t happened, so I can be silent no longer. I will explain this so even you, the Donald Trump voter, can understand.

Donald Trump says what people are thinking

If you are one of these people, let me break it down for you. You are bigoted, racist, homophobic, xenophobic, misogynistic, socially retarded, ethically bankrupt and really, just a bad person. If you are one of these people who believes Donald Trump is “telling it like it is”, you are not a Patriot and you certainly, my friend, are no Christian. I used “friend” in there for sarcasm. We could never be friends.

Most of us walk this earth pretty happy to be alive. We can get along with people because that is what we call a civilized approach to existence. We have a common understanding that even though things may not be exactly as we would like, we respect one another, listen to one another and do our best to live and work alongside each other. Heck, we may even become better people for knowing and embracing people of another ethnicity, religion and background. We actually embrace diversity. We understand the difference between passion and fundamentalist behavior. If someone has a differing opinion, we can respect that about one another and move on, hopefully on to find something in common to share. So, you’re an atheist? I love puppies. Do you love puppies? Awesome.

Just because someone has the balls to say what you’re thinking, does not make it right, especially when your thoughts are asinine. Choosing to single out a race or religion of people because they make you uncomfortable (probably because you are uneducated) is about the most idiotic and dangerous (an all too common combination) stance to take. Too often, bigoted and racist people choose this behavior because they are looking for someone to blame for their circumstance. They want to break stuff and hit people who don’t share their values, usually because that is the lowest and most dim-witted form of expression a human can exhibit. It’s no coincidence that it seems to be the chosen and embraced form of articulation for a Trump supporter. Also, most people who are racist couldn’t form their own opinion if their life depended on it. They look for someone equally as ignorant to tell them how to feel, take charge and drive that reckless bus right off the cliff. Bingo! Trump.

He’s going to make America great again

We know what you’re referring to. Just come out and say it. You’re not fooling anyone with this prancing around your prejudice. You want brown people put back in their place; the back of the bus, back in the fields, back in Mexico, back in the Middle East, back in the kitchen, back in your yard, back in your laundry room. Let’s face it, brown people with a dream and a common goal scare you. Brown people with too much pride, dignity and education make you uncomfortable. It was so much easier for you, back in the days of Jim Crow.

He’s going to build a wall

Hopefully, it will be built to keep you away from decent people.

He’s going to keep out Muslims because they’re all terrorists

I would live with a million Muslims before I would want to live next door to a Trump supporter. White Think-they-are-Christian Men are the single biggest threat to our National Security. It’s embedded in our history, from sea to shining sea. Read any good gun violence statistics lately? Hint: it’s not the brown people who are carrying out mass shootings. Perhaps learning about Native American history might jog a memory or two. Slavery was another lovely idea conceived by these same guys. When that didn’t work out, we entered a whole new era of lynching and burning of brown folk, courtesy of you-know-who. Segregation? No problem. Gay people freak you out? They’ve got an answer for that too. Mr. Trump, your fearless leader, has filled your self-righteous noggin with so many lies and indecencies about the Muslim religion, I doubt there’s hope for you. After all, facing your own insecurities, faults and shortcomings is much harder than choosing to believe a con-artist and a pimp. By the way, you’re his ho and you’re so busy being fucked, you don’t even realize it.

 

In conclusion, there may be some of you who believe that I am no better, as I have spent the last few moments exposing your ignorance with very harsh remarks. However, you are mistaken…again. Your time has come and through your words and actions, you really have been asking for this. The majority of Americans work tirelessly to create a place where people of every race, religion and orientation can be safe, considered equal and treated so under the law; a country that welcomes those in need, a country that takes care of its most desperate. We will not sit idly by and watch you try to unravel this democracy and make a mockery of our hard work. We will work state by state to ensure you do not ever elect anyone who threatens the integrity of this great nation. If you’ve managed, trust me, we are working to vote them out of office. Believe me when I tell you that you are the minority; the ignorant. There is no place for you here. You are a zit on the butt of this country; the proverbial head lice of the United States.

 

I leave you with a choice. Either wake up and join the rest of civilized society, or to quote your boorish leader, “Get the hell out”.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Get The Lead Out

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I don’t like to speak in 3rd person, but Sistah is angry. I’ve been waiting and watching. I’ve been monitoring Social Media to see what course of action is being taken to help minimize this emergency. Sadly, I haven’t seen enough. True, I’ve read a few posts on FB expressing outrage and heartbreak, but most are forwarded news stories articulating the sentiments of others.

I’m talking about the water crisis in Flint, Michigan.

I’m not sure if you are aware, but a city in the United States of America has been systematically poisoned by its water supply since April 2014 when the state-appointed Emergency Financial Manager, Darnell Earley, decided to sever ties with the Detroit water system and switch the water source to the Flint River without proper testing.

Cost savings: $100/day.

Almost immediately, citizens began complaining of the rancid smell, discoloration, skin rashes and tile rot (yes, tile rot). Yet, the city did nothing. Well, let me take that back, in January 2015, fresh bottled water was provided to the state building in Flint when employees complained. The Governor, Rick Snyder, said he had no knowledge of this but stood by his proclamation that the city water was indeed safe to drink.

In September 2015, independent investigations conducted by concerned physicians revealed the cause of the multiple E Coli outbreaks, Legionnaire’s Disease and significant increase in lead levels in the infant population. October 2015, Governor Snyder switches the water supply back to Detroit. However, it is estimated that it will take at least 6 months before that water is even remotely safe for drinking. Still, the damage has been done.

The population of Flint is just shy of 100,000 residents, majority African American, about 44% living below the poverty level. Many of the homes have lead levels so high, the supplied filtration systems don’t even work. Children have irreversible brain damage. Older children are losing their permanent teeth to rot and many residents are losing their hair. Various diagnoses are poisoning from lead, copper, aluminum and chromium. Brittle bones, low white blood cell count, loss of memory and trouble with concentration. We teach our children to drink water instead of soda or juice, right? What happens when the water is killing them?

PSA’s have been sent to advise residents that it is OKAY to bathe in tap water, as long as you don’t get it in your mouth. Ever bathe a baby?

So far, only a handful of people involved have resigned or been fired. No one, to date, has been charged with a crime. We’ve seen this time and again. A certain Hurricane Katrina comes to mind.

Where’s your outrage? Are you sitting your behind up in church every Sunday and professing to love your neighbor, but only paying “lip service”? Our fellow citizens need aid, not feeble commentary in passing. Get up off your righteous butt and start a water drive or donate to one of many organizations at Ground Zero that can get clean, safe water directly to Flint residents. I don’t want to see another Bible quote, verse or inspirational mumbo jumbo post until you can confidently say that you are really making a difference in the life of someone else.

To make it easy for you, here is a link to help you donate:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/how-to-help-flint-water-crisis_us_569e8e78e4b0cd99679b9541

And He Said Unto Me…

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Today started off like any other normal day for me. I was minding my own business (hahahaha) when The Lord came unto me and said, “Sistah, I’m going to work through you today”. I was not surprised, as He Who Makes All Things New, often comes to me with the same proposal. I did have quite a bit on my proverbial plate this afternoon, so I replied, “Sorry, HG (short for Holy Ghost), I’m pretty busy with these holiday decorations. I’ve got to trim one more tree, get out the nativity scene, light the third candle on the menorah, figure out what to do for Kwanza and did I miss Ramadan? I know, pay a visit to Kim and Kanye. I hear they’re creating Saints without your blessing”. Needless to say, The Big Kahuna was having none of it. “Sit down and get comfortable”, exclaimed ELOHIM.

Please keep in mind that Savior in Chief can be pretty long-winded and tends to use some serious testament speak. In the interest of time and translation, I have paraphrased His word for the reader. That being said, without further ado, I give you a message from The Almighty:

  1. Stop using religion as an instrument to promote fear, hate and/or violence. Anyone, and I mean anyone, who calls My name or My buddies Allah, Krishna, HaShem, Queztalcoatl (Google it), Breged, Jah or Zeus while participating in above said behaviors, is NOT a part of any religious faith.
  2. For the love of ME, stop insisting your religion is better. There’s room for all of us.
  3. Stop praying to ME over all this gun violence. I blessed you humans with common sense so that you would fix this mess you’ve created. I’m getting pretty tired hearing all the why why why. Wanna know Why? Because you are no longer as connected with one another. You don’t listen. You don’t want to get involved. You don’t know your neighbor.
  4. Try talking to a friend IN PERSON. (Sistah, get me a Snapple. I’m parched)
  5. Inspirational quotes are pretty stupid unless you actually wrote them.
  6. Just because I created weed doesn’t mean it’s good for you. I also created hemlock and rattlesnakes.
  7. I LOVE the Gays! Worry about your own relationships. Some of you hetero humans need to just sit down and be quiet. Let’s just say, many of you didn’t choose My best work.
  8. My Autobiography is meant to be a story of how to be a better human. It is NOT, however, to be used for your own personal Jesus Police Task Force. If it were, you’d all be feeling some smite from Me right about now.
  9. My Son’s birthday does not require you go in to debt. Not the reason I started this.
  10. If I put Donald Trump on this earth to test your faith, some of you are failing miserably. You better recognize.
  11. And Yes, I do protect fools, babies and drunks. I have an agreement with America’s Funniest Home Videos and YouTube.

Three hours go by, I’m absolutely exhausted and my hand is cramping. Thus, Jehovah lays one more piece of knowledge on me to deliver:

  • Some people just don’t get it. Whether they weren’t hugged enough as a child or they have some sort of chemical imbalance (science is a real thing), it’s up to YOU to make a difference. Yes, I like to hear from you, but there are plenty of humans who don’t pray to ME who are making a positive difference by their actions. Religion was created to uplift humans, not frighten, objectify or chastise (although Catholicism does appear sketchy now and again). Your time on this earth is short for a reason. It is designed for you to make the most of every moment. For My Sake, quit your whining, end the blame game, put on your grownup panties and get out there to spread some good.

Food For Thought for those Starved of Truth

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Filed under In the news, Straight Talk

Oh my, such stereotypical behavior coming out of Baltimore this week. Didn’t these people learn anything from Ferguson? Don’t they realize that destroying other people’s property and looting does nothing to further their cause? They expect us to want to help them while they behave like thugs and animals.

Does this sound like anything you’ve heard or read this week? I, for one, am sick and tired of the commentary. If one more person utters this to me, I may pick up a brick and toss it through a window.

Imagine, if you will, that you are born a person of color, into a life of poverty, an overcrowded and underfunded educational system, perhaps a broken home and little to no support system. Businesses cannot grow in your community because people of color will more likely than not be turned down for small business loans. Jobs are scarce because you have no education, skills or experience. Parents are working outside of the neighborhood when and where they can, thus unable to be home and ensure their children are safe and supervised. Those who have taken an oath to serve and protect only serve to bully and intimidate. You are a target any time you leave your home, either by others who have lost their moral compass or officers who deem your life to be of no value.  You are routinely stripped of what little dignity you may have, by a Country that looks upon you as a burden. You are more likely to die from diseases that are generally treatable because you don’t have access to quality medical care or knowledge of warning signs when you should seek help. You begin to look at others who look like you and resent them. You begin to hate them because they are a reflection of your hopelessness. You are violent because you are invisible. You are violent because you are void of all feeling. You are violent because nothing fills that cavity where aspirations and dreams once dwelled.

True, some make it out. The majority do not. The majority continue the cycle. Many Americans seem to be okay with this, as long as it doesn’t spill into their existence. When it becomes uncomfortable, then it gets attention. Just as with Ferguson, Baltimore is drawing attention to an issue. Unfortunately, the issue seems to be how black folk cannot control themselves. The idea of rioting has overshadowed the truth, which is very convenient for those who don’t want to face the root cause.  It seems to give a pass to the problem at hand, because we see how angry and scary African Americans truly are. No wonder the police are killing them. For that one, I may hurl a garbage can.

Let’s turn the tables for a moment. I wonder what actions would be taken if the headlines read:

Unarmed White Man Choked To Death by Black Policemen While Pleading He Could Not Breathe

Unarmed White Man Shot In the Back by Black Policeman

White Man’s Spine Mysteriously Severed in Paddy Wagon after Arrest by Black Policemen

Unarmed White Man Shot to Death in Wal-Mart by Black Policemen for Holding a Water Gun

Unarmed White Man Shot to Death on Street by Black Policeman

Unarmed White Man Pulled out of Car and Beaten Severely by Black Policemen for Broken Tail Light

White Woman Arrested For Not Giving Up Bus Seat to Black Man

White Man Found Murdered In Connection With Allegation That He Whistled at a Black Woman. All Black Jury Finds Black Defendant’s Not Guilty

White Man Beaten Half to Death by Black Policemen. Jury Finds Black Officers Not Guilty

White People’s Church Bombed. Four White Children Dead. Black Defendant’s Found Not Guilty.

 White President and First Lady Depicted as Monkeys in Email Passed Around by Members on Capitol Hill

White Women Dying of Breast Cancer at a Rate of 10-1 Over Black Women

White Men 12 Times More Likely to go to Prison Than Black Men

12 Year Old White Boy Shot and Killed By Black Officers for Having a BB Gun

White Man Shot by Black Man Dressed As Officer During a Police Sting. Black Man Not a Policeman but Apologizes Before Heading Off to a Bahamas Vacation

You can choose to continue to believe that this is a Black problem, not an American problem.  You can continue to believe that ignoring the problem will make it go away. You can be “put out” that you cannot attend a MLB game in Baltimore this week. You can keep insisting that this is America and everyone has the same chance to succeed. Just make sure and duck to avoid the rock I may throw at your head.

Or, you can face the fact that our Country, no matter how great, has a problem; a big problem.

I seem to recall reading about a time in this Country when a large group of demonstrators who’s voices were not being heard, destroyed other people’s property, got the attention of those in power and started a Revolution that changed our Country forever. Maybe the next great Revolution in these United States of America will be for Equality, Liberty & Justice For All… Again.